a little update
Things aren’t the way they were before. You wouldn’t even recognize me anymore. Not that you knew me back then, but it all comes back to me, in the end.
Actually, things are mostly the same! My hair’s gotten longer (my hair guy is a state away), I’ve gotten a raise - and I’m finally being recognized for some of the things I handle in my day to day, non online life.
That’s not to say the online side isn’t good, either - I’ve been learning 3d modeling very efficiently and cranking out static models for a current game project I am co-developing on. You know what it is.
Before long I’ll be a pro, right? Right?? Maybe. Just gotta keep the train moving. Maybe hit a train station once or twice to refuel.
I hope all is well with you. Never forget to breathe in the morning air or listen to the wind swell beside you. Those small moments can make some of the worst days into good ones. More importantly, those good days will become memorable days. Days of growth and learning, where you overcome troubles within yourself and with-out.
Speaking of troubles - I’ve been treated pretty poorly lately by some people who I really don’t know well… they make fun of me and I feel like I don’t give them much cause to do so. Maybe it’s the position I’m in which leads to it being easy to say these things to me? I’m human too, you know. Anyways, most of it is actually silver tier stuff. Not bad at all… aside from an image that got spammed a few times which framed me as a fool. Detestable! It happens, though. Fools we all are.
Admittedly, I’m a bit lonely. My friends, I love them dearly. I’d never say it like that, but I let them know I appreciate them being here with me on this planet and spending the fleeting moments by my side, and me by theirs. Relationships beyond the bounds of friendship are very complicated. I generally approach them in a simple way, but it’s come off as far too cavalier or uncaring in the past. My actions don’t speak as loudly as I’d like in those instances.
To keep it more literal, too, I am having trouble finding people with the values that I… well, value. Family, a bit of stability.. the desire to learn and grow-explore. I guess some of those things fundamentally fight eachother, so maybe it’s my fault. Even then, it’s hard to get at least two of those boxes checked. Could be my area, maybe.
Though, as it goes… I don’t put myself out there as much as I could. I just detest all of these apps where the main purpose is to put one’s head in a box - for lack of literally explicit terminology. It isn’t something I care about a lot. Sure, it’s great fun… but I’ve been taken advantage of more times than I should in that regard. Should being 0 times.
Sorry, that’s a bit of a downer.. how about this instead? I’ve become a bit of a grillmaster. Guess it’s been literal trial by fire.. but I got through the gates. 5 pounds of chicken with skin and bone at a time will do that, I guess. I don’t know, honestly. I have almost 0 experience in that area. It tastes good though! I use a marinade called Chiavettas (google it) that’s from my hometown of Buffalo. Damn amazing.
Next thing. Been playing Oblivion right and proper for a while straight now. The remaster, I mean. God, it’s got the magic. Mechanically 1:1, anyways. Excluding a tiny leveling related change. Todd, you did it! (Virt Studios did it though, so… he’s probably an exec director at least.)
Also, Boneraiser minions! An endless classic for me, swarm type roguelite where you raise stinky Boners and other skelly minions to do thy bidding and slay all who oppose you. Great little game with great music too. I play it at work on my deck- endless fun.
Well, I guess that’s all for now. Thanks for reading! It’s an actual entry, so.. I won’t tell you if I’m on the John or not. But the bat symbol will be there.
Love ya fellahs and other